Facts-only consistency check on two freshly drafted scenes in [redacted]…

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2026-09-02

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Facts-only consistency check on two freshly drafted scenes in redacted: draft/book-01/scenes/99-seventy-miles-in-eleven-days.md unpublished (Days 58–61 = 12–15 Fallowmonth, redacted to Wystow) and 100-the-sending-book.md unpublished (Day 61 night, the field office). Read them, then check every checkable fact against notes/canon/world/geography.md (redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose No entry pending inquiry. redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted copying, departure the 13th — the draft has them leaving redacted on the 12th? check 'had said three days... redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted, redacted); the field office that night: redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted in the fellows' passage), notes/canon/world/silent-soil.md (the four plots of site D: 14, 11, 9, 22 — the draft has redacted's registers show the order eleven, fourteen, nine, twenty-two: check whether canon fixes the order of the four plots' beginnings; 'four of these five were unknown until Cornmonth'; the register of sites: does it have a page for Fenholt with a date from before the party got there? — the draft's last line: check what the register of sites is and whether a Fenholt page with an earlier date is plausible or invented; it is an engine beat and must not contradict the sealed shape), notes/sealed/silent-soil.md (shape only): check nothing explains; check Peri's last line in 99 does not leak. Also: redacted's 'It's the one thing in your book I've struck' — redacted striking a line in Edwin's grey book: plausible? new. STRICT: never read chapters/, rewrite/, draft/book-01/rejected-act2/, summaries/, or plans/book-01/arc-0*.md, unpublished or their git history. Report numbered findings with quoted line, canon source, minimal fix; then 'New facts'. Do not edit any file.

30 tool calls

🔧 Read draft/book-01/scenes/99-seventy-miles-in-eleven-days.md unpublished

✅ 36 lines, 5554 chars

🔧 Read draft/book-01/scenes/100-the-sending-book.md unpublished

✅ 50 lines, 6463 chars

🔧 Read notes/canon/world/geography.md

🔧 Read notes/canon/world/timeline.md

✅ 403 lines, 25687 chars

✅ 870 lines, 56502 chars

🔧 Read notes/canon/characters/redacted.md

✅ 245 lines, 15058 chars

🔧 Read notes/canon/characters/edwin.md

🔧 Read notes/canon/characters/minor.md

🔧 Read notes/canon/world/silent-soil.md

✅ 973 lines, 64921 chars

🔧 Read notes/canon/institutions.md

✅ 1 lines, 96 chars

✅ 670 lines, 42638 chars

✅ 628 lines, 40049 chars

🔧 Bash: find redacted/notes -iname "institutions.md" -o -iname "silent-soil.md" -path "*sealed*"

✅ 2 lines, 131 chars — redacted/notes/sealed/silent-soil.md / redacted/notes/canon/world/institutions.md

🔧 Read notes/sealed/silent-soil.md

🔧 Read notes/canon/world/institutions.md

✅ 906 lines, 53066 chars

✅ 787 lines, 50971 chars

🔧 Bash: grep -n -i "register of sites\|Fenholt.*page\|page for Fenholt" redacted/notes/sealed/s…

✅ 1 lines, 439 chars

🔧 Bash: grep -n -i "register\b" redacted/notes/sealed/silent-soil.md | head -80

✅ 20 lines, 2239 chars

🔧 Read notes/sealed/silent-soil.md

✅ 70 lines, 4222 chars

Consistency check — scenes 99 & 100

Numbered findings

1. Registers "asked for" — wrong date, appears twice.
Scene 100 unpublished redacted sentence: unpublished prose That's six weeks."* and later, redacted: "I'd have done it on the fifteenth of Cornmonth if anybody had asked me…"
redacted sentence: unpublished prose 011) — and the arithmetic only works with the 25th: 25 Cornmonth → 15 Fallowmonth = 46 days ≈ "six weeks." From the 15th it's 60 days (~8.6 weeks), which "six weeks" cannot round to. Fix: change both instances of "the fifteenth of Cornmonth" to "the twenty-fifth of Cornmonth."

  1. The redacted box's arrival date is wrong, and the departure logic breaks with it.
    Scene 100 unpublished redacted sentence: unpublished prose
    Canon fixes the redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose Edwin's actual departure for Fenholt was Day 7 (21 Cornmonth), five days later, not "the next morning." The scene has silently swapped in the other box's date (20 Cornmonth/Day 6 is when the signed sample box "pre-empting his letter" arrived) to make the "left the next morning" beat work, but that conflates two distinct, separately-established parcels. Fix: date should be 16 Cornmonth; strike or rewrite "I left for Fenholt the next morning" (he didn't leave for five more days).

3. Plot order contradicts Established canon.
Scene 100 unpublished, Edwin: *"it wasn't redacted first. redacted sentence: unpublished prose
redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted's far corner." This is a direct, unflagged contradiction of on-page canon, not a Working figure open to easy revision. The sealed file's site-dating table also treats "D — Wystow, plot 14" as the site's defining/earliest reference point. Either the scene needs plot 14 first (matching canon), or this is a deliberate correction-of-earlier-report beat that needs to be flagged and decided explicitly (and silent-soil.md's Established bullet updated to match) — it cannot stand silently contradicted. Needs an author ruling, not a quiet fix.

4. Board text reworded — canon quotes it verbatim twice.
Scene 99 unpublished: "Trials suspended. No entry until the inquiry is done. By order."
Canon (geography.md and silent-soil.md, both): "Trials suspended. No entry pending inquiry. By order." — quoted identically in two files, reads as a fixed on-page quotation from the accepted arc-3 material, not a paraphrasable fact. Fix: restore "No entry pending inquiry."

  1. redacted's "dug in all nine" softened to "walked to."
    Scene 99 unpublished: "He had walked to all nine, at eighteen."
    redacted sentence: unpublished prose Distinct verb, distinct register (paid manual work vs. redacted sentence: unpublished prose

  2. redacted sentence: unpublished prose
    Scene 100 unpublished redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted/second-hand material with no speaker tag given here, but its content (institutional risk, chain-of-custody, "ends careers") is squarely redacted's register per redacted.md's voice rules (warrant = the document and its risk, never Edwin's framing-correction mode). Putting it in Edwin's mouth as his own reasoning is dramatically defensible (him echoing redacted's stated fear back at him) but should be confirmed as intentional — the canon citation reads like it may belong to redacted originally.

7. "It's the one thing in your book I've struck" — new and unprecedented.
Scene 99 unpublished, redacted: "I wrote it down. It's the one thing in your book I've struck." Nothing in canon (edwin.md, redacted.md references via minor/institutions) establishes redacted ever writing in or striking a line from Edwin's own grey book — the grey book is consistently his private instrument (his own capacity figures, his own entries, "written in his own hand"). This is plausible as a new, intimate beat but has no precedent and quietly grants redacted access to/authority over a very personal document. Flag for confirmation rather than treat as an error — not contradicted, just new and load-bearing enough to want a deliberate yes.

8. "There's a page for Fenholt… a date from before we got there" — unsealed mystery beat.
Peri's closing line in scene 99 unpublished introduces a new engine detail: Wystow's register of sites already carries an entry for the Fenholt site predating the party's own discovery of it. I checked this against notes/sealed/silent-soil.md in full (including the site-dating table and "Site by site" section) and found no existing sealed material that accounts for a pre-dated Fenholt register page — the sealed file's own site chronology (pale field oldest, then Wystow, then redacted, then Ordish/Fenholt most recent) gives no mechanism for Wystow's registry to have anticipated Fenholt's site before anyone reported it. This is exactly the situation CLAUDE.md's sealed-answer rule warns against: a load-bearing mystery clue introduced with no written answer behind it yet. It is a strong, effective line — but per project rule it should not go forward until either (a) a sealed answer is written that accounts for it, or (b) it's confirmed this is meant as a red herring/misreading (e.g., the date is innocuous — a routine registry entry unrelated to the phenomenon) and is phrased to avoid implying otherwise. As requested, no sealed content is disclosed above — this is a shape/gap report only.

  1. The register of sites (redacted's) is itself fine, not anachronistic.
    Checked: minor.md already establishes redacted "keeps the register of sites" as her own registry document (cited to ch. redacted sentence: unpublished prose Scene 99 unpublished having her say "The register of sites is mine" on Day 61 is therefore consistent — the later item formalizes what was already her personal registry practice. No fix needed; flagged only to close out the check item.

10. Minor phrasing note — "on the twelfth… had been right on the twelfth."
Scene 99 unpublished's opening sentence is ambiguous against the Working timeline note (a day at redacted copying, departure the 13th). It doesn't clearly assert travel began the 12th, but the sentence rhythm ("right on the twelfth and on the thirteenth") reads as if travel spanned three days starting the 12th, which would contradict the Working ruling. Not a hard error as written, but worth a light rewrite for clarity (e.g., separate the day-of-prediction from the travel days explicitly) so a reader can't take it as departure-on-the-12th.

New facts

None to add to canon — every fact this pass would otherwise register is already covered by an existing citation, a flagged contradiction above, or the unsealed-mystery flag in finding 8. No file was edited.