2026-09-02
User:
Facts-only consistency check on two freshly drafted scenes in redacted: draft/book-01/scenes/97-first-known-first-looked-at.md unpublished (Days 55–56 = 9–10 Fallowmonth) and 98-nine-sentences.md unpublished (Day 57 = 11 Fallowmonth). redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted's a spade; Peri's pencil map 'a shape like nothing... redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted's line, 'not evidence'; redacted eleven miles NE, redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted.md (the second hand; the registers in days; the sending-book), notes/canon/characters/redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose Also: (1) redacted's 'That's three. Fenholt, the redacted place, this' — the three places where the four-mile test was answered no: does canon list Fenholt as one of the three (Holm Deep and the Ordish field? the pale field and Ranner's Sluice?); (2) 'the fourth time in a month he had watched a person write against what they had wanted to be true, and two of the four had been him' — count against the page: redacted? redacted's no? Edwin's list? redacted's name? redacted sentence: unpublished prose STRICT: never read chapters/, rewrite/, draft/book-01/rejected-act2/, summaries/, or plans/book-01/arc-0*.md, unpublished or their git history. Report numbered findings with quoted line, canon source, minimal fix; then 'New facts'. Do not edit any file.
🔧 Bash: cat draft/book-01/scenes/97-first-known-first-looked-at.md unpublished draft/book-01/sc…
✅ 74 lines, 12863 chars
🔧 Bash: cat notes/canon/world/silent-soil.md
✅ 43 lines, 2189 chars
🔧 Bash: grep -n "" notes/canon/world/silent-soil.md | sed -n '1,400p'
✅ 400 lines, 25272 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '400,700p' notes/canon/world/silent-soil.md
✅ 270 lines, 16353 chars
Now let me check timeline.md, minor.md, redacted.md, redacted.md, edwin.md, and system.md sections.
🔧 Bash: grep -n "Day 5[4-8]\|55\|56\|57" notes/canon/world/timeline.md | sed -n '1,80p'
✅ 8 lines, 511 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '435,470p' notes/canon/world/timeline.md
✅ 36 lines, 2292 chars
Wystow arrival is 15 Fal — matches the draft letter's "on or about the fifteenth." Now let's check edwin.md nine-sentences note, minor.md, redacted.md, redacted.md.
🔧 Bash: grep -n "embarrass\|nine sentence\|sixpence" notes/canon/characters/edwin.md echo ---MINO…
✅ 31 lines, 2075 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '320,340p' notes/canon/characters/edwin.md echo --- grep -rn "guild house\|refused…
✅ 25 lines, 1680 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '235,260p' notes/canon/world/geography.md echo ---INSTITUTIONS--- sed -n '280,310p…
✅ 58 lines, 3840 chars
🔧 Bash: grep -n "redacted\|warden.*dead\|dead.*warden\|daughter" notes/canon/*.md notes/canon//…
✅ 27 lines, 2814 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '355,375p' notes/canon/characters/minor.md
✅ 21 lines, 1061 chars
🔧 Bash: grep -n "redacted place\|Ranner" notes/canon/world/geography.md
✅ 11 lines, 791 chars
🔧 Bash: grep -n "Deep thread\|never touches\|evidence" notes/canon/system.md
✅ 2 lines, 143 chars
🔧 Bash: grep -rn "Deep thread" notes/ 2>/dev/null
✅ 17 lines, 2844 chars
🔧 Bash: sed -n '120,140p' notes/canon/characters/redacted.md
✅ 20 lines, 1383 chars
silent-soil.md line ~285–287, redacted.mdline ~128–132,institutions.md line ~280–282): redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted/redacted as the third — matching redacted.md's "the eleven-mile walk to redacted redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted place is a different, unrelated assessment (5 Fal, a dog's-date correction job, redacted.md line 127) with no stated connection to the four-mile mouth test.2. "The fourth time in a month... two of the four had been him" — plausible but unverifiable, flag for author.
Quoted line (97): "...it was the fourth time in a month he had watched a person write against what they had wanted to be true, and two of the four had been him."
redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose No second Edwin instance is checkable in the cited canon files within the same month (Fallowmonth); nothing contradicts it, but nothing confirms it either. Not an error, but not independently verifiable from the cited sources — flag for the author to confirm intent (e.g. redacted sentence: unpublished prose 013, an earlier month?).
3. Marsh's/Edwin's "embarrass him" — resolved, no error.
redacted sentence: unpublished prose Scene 98 unpublished redacted sentence: unpublished prose
4. Nine sentences and Marsh's own answer — matches canon, correctly kept separate.
Canon (silent-soil.md line ~392–397): Edwin's nine sentences cover cause-unknown, resume-at-own-risk (would not advise/forbid), fencing/draining/ploughing/selling impossibility, the record's value, water fitness unknown, sixpence paid. redacted sentence: unpublished prose The draft correctly keeps this out of Edwin's nine-sentence list and gives it to Marsh's own dialogue ("The tenants stay off it. The record is kept. redacted sentence: unpublished prose No fix needed.
5. Wystow arrival "the fifteenth" — consistent.
redacted sentence: unpublished prose
6. Weave answers on the spoil bank, 11 Fal, noon — verbatim match.
Draft's three lines match silent-soil.md exactly: *"[redacted, and redacted.]" / "[You are counting places. redacted sentence: unpublished prose redacted sentence: unpublished prose Consistent, canon-sanctioned.
7. "Beginnings is not beginners" vs canon's "Beginnings isn't beginners" — minor wording drift.
Draft (98): "Beginnings is not beginners. Middle column." Canon (silent-soil.md): "Beginnings isn't beginners." Contraction dropped. Minimal fix: restore the contraction if exact-quote fidelity to that established phrase is wanted (this is the phrase's origin scene, so the draft actually sets canon's wording here — worth getting right since canon currently quotes the contracted form).
8. Guild houses / dead warden's daughter — matches canon closely.
redacted sentence: unpublished prose Matches minor.md line ~364–366 exactly (including "nine years back," "in a woman's memory," daughter reading her mother's hand). No fix needed.
10. Cause-of-phenomenon check — clean.
Neither scene explains what redacted is or why it appears; both stay within "first known / first looked at," dating, and Marsh's practical response. No sealed material is exposed on the page — consistent with canon's permanent agnosticism.
11. "Four being seen is not four appearing" — permitted.
Peri's third-column note in scene 97 unpublished pre-echoes the later verbatim Weave-adjacent line "That's not five appearing. That's five being seen" (ch. 030, Saltmonth) — but this is a distinct, earlier utterance at a different site-count (four vs. five) and isn't presented as a quote of that later line. Permitted as a natural recurring turn of phrase for the same character; not a contradiction.
redacted sentence: unpublished prose
No files were edited.